32 Comments

Thanks for the kind words on the loss of my brother, everyone.

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Thanks for sharing. As ever, your book choices spark with me.

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My condolences, Tim. I am very sorry for the loss of your brother. Do you feel like writing about him, at least for yourself? I hope it’s not too personal of a question.

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Not specifically, but maybe about the whole family of origin thing at some point. It's been....interesting.

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My condolences on your loss.

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My condolences on the death of your brother. Even if expected, the death of a sibling hits hard.

Elvis Costello is an excellent soundtrack for jump-starting your Monday. Take care.

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Elvis is a great soundtrack. Period.

BTW, I love your handle. My father, self proclaimed wit that he was, created a menu for a fancy dinner for a reunion dinner that his Stanford college humor magazine held (The Hammer and Coffin Society/Stanford Chaparral) entitled Ladislav's Café Maldemerde...

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Now that your picture's in the paper being rhythmically admired

And you can have anyone that you have ever desired

All you got to tell me now is why, why, why, why?

Having deep conversations with Pepper is NOT a sign that you're losing your mind. Period.

With all the will in the world

Diving for dear life

When we could be diving for pearls

I found the solution to the guilt inducing pile o' books. The Kindle. I have one, attractive leather bound flat thing on the nightstand (or in the pocket of my cargo shorts or or) that contains the book I'm currently reading (a silly Sci-Fi thing by Julian May) and the next zillion or so of 'em. I keep it with me because in the inevitable whirlwind of errands, appointments, adulting, etc there's always some time where I can read for a few minutes rather than tapping my foot impatiently. Helps keeping me from strapping on that Postal Uniform and walking into an establishment and enthusiasticly greeting the inhabitants "Say hello to my little friend!" But maybe that's just me.

But, unlike you, I'm a fast reader. Dyslexia is a weird beastie and once my brain clicked and I figured out where to START and could actually read — I became voracious. I remember being humiliated every time my parents would tell the story of the minute I learned to read (and it literally was in a minute, dyslexia, duh) because what they thought was this great, earth shattering accomplishment seemed prosaic to me. It just happened and I could read now. But the long and the short of it is, from not being able to read AT ALL, I was inhaling novels within a month. Brains are weird.

My baby has Egyptian eyes

And a wicked look beyond compare

If you thought I was a fool for you

Then I must be a bigger fool for her

I'm truly sorry for the loss of your brother, but don't feel guilty if it also brings a feeling of relief. It sounds like his last chunk of time was difficult for him and for the rest of your family. I know that there was a feeling of relief for me when my Dad passed and it took me a while to admit/deal with it. Now comes the crap. I WAS that guy screaming death threats at people who weren't giving me the Death Certificates (without any realization of the irony at the time). This is a shitty time but it gets less heavy and eventually, you start to feel a bit of accomplishment and that you've done right by your brother and your family. I'm nearing the finish line with mine (half a house in Sausalito is being wired into my bank account this afternoon) and I do know that I've legitimately done the best I could have for my Dad and my family. That's all you can really hope for.

I wanna bite the hand that feeds me

I wanna bite that hand so badly

I want to make them wish they'd never seen me

Dr Toby prescribes Freeze Dried Beef Liver treats for Pepper's ophthalmologic issues.

I wish you'd known me when I was alive, I was a funny feller

The crowd would hoot and holler for more

I wore a drunk's red nose for applause

Oh yes I was a comical priest

"With a joke for the flock and a hand up your fleece"

Drooling the drink and the lipstick and greasepaint

Down the cardboard front of my dirty dog-collar

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Love this story, Mark. And yeah, I think anyone in this position has probably spent time yelling at people to speed up the sending of the death certificates, as nothing, not one thing, can be done without them. I'm not a Kindle person but it's a great idea for those moments you detail. My daughter is a voracious reader and goes everywhere with one.

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I love paper books, too and I moved several (I think it ultimately got up to eight) full sized bookcases that were absolutely stuffed one time too many. and, like the vinyl, the VHS Tapes, CDs, DVDs, etc I got to the point where my back informed me that I was not going to ever move them again. The kindle takeover was gradual, at first it was because it was easier when traveling or on camping trips but, then it was because I could read at night next to a sleeping significant other without having the light on.

But what really did it was that last move of the books. And I started to see benefits, if I finished a book and I wasn't near a bookstore or at home, I wasn't suddenly unmoored and "out of book" because I had the next ten books on the Kindle already, hell if the device gets full, Amazon automatically clears 'em off the device but stores them in your account and you can pull 'em back on at any time.

I do still have specific art books and design books because there's no replacing those but I'll never have a huge paper library again.

Yeah, the death certificates are a bitch. One thing I learned a few years before dad passed (when my mother left earlier) is that the first thing I do is a high res scan of the certificate and convert it to a high quality PDF. It's amazing how much you can get done by emailing that PDF to places. I've even been able to show people the certificate on my phone if I've forgotten the actual paper. I now never go anywhere without those high res scans of my parents' Death Certificates and my own Birth Certificate (and actually my brother's too just in case).

Now I hope you followed Dr Toby's prescription for Pepper!

What shall we do, what shall we do with all this useless beauty?

All this useless beauty...

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Oh yeah. I turn to look at my "coffee table" - which has never seen so much as a single cup of coffee - where a dozen-plus half-finished/still-reading/maybe-tomorrow books are piled (amid an equal number of half-read "New Yorker" magazines) in my patented sedimentary filing system ... and wonder if I'll ever get through them all.

Well, I will ... but not before buying more to-be-read books, so yeah, it's just another iteration of the labors of Sisyphus. Although it happens from time to time, it's a rare book that hooks me so hard that I have to plow straight through to the finish.

Onward, into the mist.

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Yeah, they will always be there -- get done (reading) what you can, is the only way forward. Just enjoy the steps, I guess, and not worry about the delays.

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DO NOT WORRY ABOUT BEING A SLOW READER!!!

I’ve been reading “The Devil’s Chessboard” by David Talbot SINCE JANUARY…

I got four more books lined up so it happens to us all…

One of the books I got in the bullpen is “Surely You Can’t Be Serious: An Oral History of ‘Airplane’”, REALLY looking forward to that one!!!

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Yeah, the books, the albums, the films, they do accrue. Sigh.

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Don't call me Shirley.

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“Because of me six men won’t be coming back”

“Seven lieutenant Zip died this morning”

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Looks like I picked the wrong week to stop sniffing glue.

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Is there ever a right week?

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You have undoubtedly already read ‘Unfaithful Music & Disappearing Ink’, however, I wonder if you’re aware that Elvis actually reads the Audible version himself. It’s essential. Great to listen to in the car, while say, driving back and forth to the repair shop, ophthalmologist or wine shop. (Way to bury the lede about an additional Substack foray.)

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I did NOT know that EC read the book, so that's a great suggestion. And yeah, the additional Substack has been percolating on and off for a while. Maybe even longer than the wine podcast I'm going to do with my friend Dan, which will also encompass film and TV and culture stuff, plus loads of wine. It's been derailed mostly by life and scheduling, which I guess is also life. The one I referenced is coming, as things fall into place about the specifics. It's going to be about writing and scripts and thus tangentially about television and film, but with an emphasis on the writing. And the people who do it or want to do it.

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I am the Queen of Procrastination but the one thing I do daily is read a book (usually fiction). I had stopped reading after college because it was such a chore reading books I didn’t choose that I was just burned out. Finally I decided to get back into it. My strategy: reading 15 minutes a day during my lunch break. That’s it. I read Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtry this way. It took me 3 months but I did it. But that was before the call of the internet and smartphones. I agree it’s even harder to read now with so many distractions. I now have added audiobooks to the mix because it grounds me and forces me not to look at my phone.

I do have a recommendation: North Woods by Daniel Mason. Damn was that book great! It’s about the woods in Western Massachusetts and a cabin/house throughout history: from colonial times to today. It blew my mind and also made me laugh. Definitely the best book I have read in a couple years.

Very sorry to hear about everything you’re going through regarding your brother’s death. It’s just a lot to deal with.

Thanks for the song ideas. Added to my playlist. Interested in hearing what you do next on Substack!

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That reminds me of my favorite Hemingway. It's a collection of short stories called The Nick Adams Stories and it's set in the New England woods...

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My daughter is a daily reader like you, Lynn. I suppose like anything it's just dedication and repetition and pretty soon it's habit. I'll look into North Woods, thanks for the rec. And. yeah, I added some info about the other Substack to Paul's reply.

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No matter where you go, there you are, and Tim, I am so glad that you are here with me!

I think that I possess many fictional traits, too, but since I think, does that not mean I am? In reality, I guess we just "are".

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Scott, you can be fictional if you like, If anybody tells you different, tell 'em I said it was OK.

I'm sure Tim would back you up, too.

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That's very kind, Scott! Glad this Substack and community are a good thing. We watch therefore we are?

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I know it don't thrill you.

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I hope it don't kill you...

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Y'know, after all these years, I'm still wrapping my head around "rhythmically admired"...

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Leave to Elvis Costello to come up with the most obscure yet spot-on, laugh-out-loud euphemism ever.

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Our buddy Dec McManus down know how to turn (twist? mutilate? mangle?) a phrase, don't he...

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Indeed he does!

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